About me: When one comes back from the future to study Dysanic, one is astonished to find how simple a life he leads. A bestselling author and creator of worlds, one would expect to find Dysanic constantly embroiled inside his own head. Instead, you meet a charming gentleman, who will introduce you to his reptiles, and offer a cookie.
About me: You know that userpic Dysanic uses, of Herbert West with bat eats? Shockingly, that’s actually an entirely accurate image of how Dysanic appears to mortal eyes.
About me: Dysanic has the best beard. Do not touch it, for it contains poison.
About me: Dysanic is a gangly thing, with a seemingly endless number of limbs and digits, stretching out into the dark space between infinities. When asked questions, expect foreign tongues, hissing responses in languages long dead. Dysanic does not listen to music so much as create it, spontaneously, at all times. Should you fear chaos, come no closer.
About me: Dysanic is a proper irishman: storyteller, fiddler, and appreciator of fine booze.
About me: Dysanic is the second-hoopiest frood to ever steal the Heart of Gold.
About me: Dysanic is my clone and pretty much the best person I’ve ever known and I love him wholly and dearly and miss him terribly.
10: If you could star in a biopic about any famous person ever, who would it be?
Aaa more famous people things. I’m going to go with Hunter S. Thompson because some of those scenes would be incredibly fun to shoot.
14: Could you win the Hunger Games?
19: You and the love of your life are having a baby, and you get to choose the name! There’s only one catch: your partner INSISTS that it be the name of a place, real or fictional. What do you name your baby?
27: You’re in the car, switching channels on the radio when you hear a song that makes you go “OH SHIT, THAT’S MY JAM!” What song is it?
Man, I have
no fucking idea
30: Have you ever bought an item of clothing because it reminded you of something a fictional character would wear?
Yes indeed I sure have
38: Do you know how to pronounce the word “pinochle”?
Have you ever thought
As a herse drove by
That you might be
The next to die?
They wrap you up
In a bloody sheet
And throw you down
About six feet deep
You’re all right
For about a week
Worms crawl in
The worms crawl out
The worms play pinochle
on your snout
They eat your eyes
They eat your nose
They eat the jelly
Between your toes
Your eyes fall out
Your teeth decay
And that’s the end
Of your wonderful day
Anybody got a spoon?
(Yes, I do know how to pronounce “pinochle”.)
45: Would you eat human flesh if it had been harvested and prepared humanely? (Say, from someone brain-dead who had marked him or herself down as an organ donor - same difference, right?)
I wouldn’t eat an organ donor, because that seems really skeevy and someone could use that organ, I’m sure.
But say we’re in Transmet and clones are being grown without brains to be harvested for meat, or a similar hypothetical? Sure would.
49: What’s your best bodily feature, objectively speaking?
How can you be objective about which “bodily feature” is best? I’m told I have good eyes, and I like them too, so I suppose I’ll go with that.
I have NEVER once said the word “shmoopypants” out loud. NOT ONCE.